Monday, November 10, 2008

Where did the Gingermobile go?

Batman had the Batmobile, the Lone Ranger had Silver and even Shrek had Donkey - so, just recently, people have been asking why I've removed my little sidebar about The Gingermobile.

Well, folks, the Gingermobile is no more.

That's to say, the car is fine. It's now the powerful chariot of a very pretty girl from Mercer County. But since she's a honey blond at best, my 1985 Pontiac Firebird no longer has the right to be called The Gingermobile. In fact, nothing does.

You heard correct: Il n'y a plus de Gingermobile.

Friends, there comes a time in a man's life when a gas-guzzling, two-seater sports car is apparently no longer an appropriate means of transport for a loving husband with a small, bouncy baby. So even though it broke my heart, I sold my beloved dream car to young couple who would no doubt enjoy it much more than I could.

When I was eighteen, I was driving the original Gingermobile - a '78 Triumph TR7 - and it was the bee's knees, the mutt's nuts and the cat's pajamas all rolled into one. Hopefully, the young couple I sold it to think exactly the same of my lovely car.

But like the passing of a beloved pet, it's not easy to fill the absence left by a heroic steed. I've been thinking long and hard about whether or not I even need a new Gingermobile - and, if I did, what that Gingermobile would be.

I can confirm only the following:

  1. It will be red.
  2. It will be fast.
  3. It will make people stop and scratch their heads.
  4. It will be wildly impractical.
  5. It will predate 1990.
  6. It will drink gasoline like it was going out of fashion.
  7. It will be all those things and yet, somehow, more...

Currently, my eye is turning to my original American chariot, the pimpin' Lincoln of former New Jersey Governor Jim 'Friday Night Special' McGreevey himself.

That rampant red roadster, made famous by a mention on Playboy Radio's breakfast show, turned so many heads, I had to have a chiropractor on retainer (try her, she's the best in New York.)

With seating for six, trunk-space for golf clubs, suitcases and at least two dead bodies, plus square good looks like I used to have (before I was introduced to American-style meatloaf) the old 80s Lincoln Town Car personified the most grown-up aspects of my wildly immature car buying tastes.

Perhaps The Gingermobile will ride again - and perhaps, that's an indication of what it might look like...


Coffee Bean said...

Oh my gosh! This post is HYSTERICAL!!!

April said...

You do realize that Jeremy, Richard, the Stig and that creepy other guy are shuddering over this post? What is wrong with you? How can you be such a fan of American crap, um I mean cars? I'm shocked and appalled. At least your cars have character, I have to give you that. Good luck on your search for a new pimp mobile. Maybe you can get the original Huggy Bear car. Or that van from the A-team.

Expat mum said...

Oh give it up. You know you're going for a red Toyota Sienna, just like mine (except mine's blue). I tell you, it's heaven heaving car seats in and out at waist height!!!

Roland Hulme said...

Expat Mum! Hush! Don't say such things! I hear that when a man buys himself a Toyota Minivan, the Department of Motor Vehicles expects him to hand in his testicles as well as his last registration documents.

April Ah, Top gear only believe in dumb things like performance, reliability, gas mileage and practicality. None of those are American traits (in cars, anyway.)

That being said, my old Triumph and MG cars handled SO much better than their American counterparts. But the Yank Tanks are just so BIG and STYLISH and FUN.

and spot on about the creepy other guy. James Mays, his name is?

mre30seattle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
mre30seattle said...

Oh no....another car love affair down the tubes with a family....

I thought that way once when I started having my family. I found nice substitutes though.

Current transport being a 1987 BMW 325 IS. Fun, sporty and pretty economical for a 6 cylinder and will go forever (currently logging just over 230K on her) and does pretty good as far as being comfortable for my two teens.

Good luck in your search for America's Next that down. It could be a reality show. I'd watch it.

Loved the post.It kept me laughing for some time.

paisley penguin said...

Wife of MR E30 says. Yes, but at one time we did have a TR7 in my parents driveway we were going to restore. Alas it has gone the way of the dodo bird.

Up next - new and old mini coopers! Or as my nephew likes to say Mini Tooper.

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