The Real Noah and his 'Ark'

Coffee Bean left a comment on my last post about the English language (and how frustrated I am that Obama - he of the giving orders - demanded that we teach our children Spanish to help them communicate with our millions of non-integrated immigrant pals.)

She wrote: "I just don't understand why the English language is not our official language... why we don't have an official language at all."

Actually, that's not true.

It is true that the federal government has never officially recognized English as the official language of the United States of America. However, 28 states have declared English their official state language (with Louisiana and Hawaii counting French and Hawaiian as co-official languages.)

Here are the states and here are the years the state legislature passed the resolution to approve their official state language:

Alabama (1990) Arkansas (1987) California (1986) Colorado (1988) Florida (1988) Georgia (1996) Illinois (1969) Indiana (1984) Iowa (2002) Kentucky (1984) Massachusetts (1975) Mississippi (1987) Missouri (1998) Montana (1995) Nebraska (1920) New Hampshire (1995) North Carolina (1987) North Dakota (1987) South Carolina (1987) South Dakota (1995) Tennessee (1984) Utah (2000) Virginia (1996) West Virginia (2005) Wyoming (1996) Hawaii (with Hawaiian) (1978) Louisiana (with French) (1807)

So more than half of America has officially recognized English as the official language - and the fact that law, communications and documentation in the Senate, congress and the White House is written in English makes English the unofficial, but de facto language of the US Government.

It's largely the same across the state legislature as well (although until 1920, New York translated all official documents into Dutch as well, as a nod to New York's origins as the Dutch colony of New Amsterdam.)

But as far as I'm concerned, all that pales into insignificance compared to the history of the English language in the United States of America - and how the American Revolution against Great Britain was so all-encompassing that even words and spelling rebelled against them.

Noah Webster

His name was Noah Webster - and if you haven't heard of him, you'll probably be familiar with his book. Webster's Dictionary is the bedside companion of every writer, teacher and college student and has been since 1783 - when Webster published his first 'speller.'

Noah Webster was born to a good Connecticut family in 1758 and started a good education at Yale university, until classes were disrupted by the American Revolutionary War. Webster served in the Connecticut militia during the war itself, before graduating two years after the Declaration of Independence was signed.

Following the war, Webster earned his law degree - but eventually decided to pursue education and writing as his career. He moved to New York City in 1793 at the request of founding father Alexander Hamilton, to help edit a Federalist newspaper.

Noah Webster was an incredibly prolific and accomplished writer and publisher. In addition to founding and editing New York's first newspaper, he threw himself into bettering the American public school system, which he saw as badly run, overcrowded and poorly equipped.

His philosophy was that America, as a new nation, deserved a consistent and all encompassing approach to reading, writing and spelling. With this in mind, he published three groundbreaking textbooks - a 'Speller,' a 'Grammar' and a 'Reader.'

What Noah Webster did was unheard of. He demanded uniformity in spelling and grammar, angrily hissing that grammar should follow "the rule of speaking" and therefore every archaic deviation from popular usage "must be wrong."

He was equally forthright about spelling, promising to rescue "our native tongue" from "the clamor of pedantry" common in England.

With this in mind, he created the first, definitive dictionary of the English language, establishing official spellings of popular words to be used consistently in all written English across the United States.

Most significantly, many of these spellings differed from traditional English. In order to simplify the rather arcane rules of British spelling and pronunciation, he encouraged conformity and created a breaking off point. From that date on, British English and American English would grow, develop and progress on parallel, but different paths - later inspiring George Bernard Shaw to remark that "England and America are two countries divided by a common language."

Webster's magnum opus took 27 years to complete - An American Dictionary of the English Language. This was the master work from which American English took form. It was a reference of almost unheard of breadth and comprehensiveness. Although regularly updated with new words and phrases, this dictionary is still in print as today's Mirriam-Webster dictionary.

Basically, this man invented American English. But more importantly, he invented it specifically as an American language - based on, but starkly different to British English.

So people might argue that America has no 'official' language, but that's not true. The official language of the United States was born in the flames of the revolution and has shaped the foundations of every American institution since that date. American English is as entwined in the fabric of the American nation as the Constitution, the Declaration of Independence, the Gettysburg Address. It is American lore.

So when Barack Obama arrogantly demands that we 'stop worrying about immigrants learning English' and 'make sure our kids speak Spanish' he is doing so in blissful ignorance of more than two hundred years of American History.

To take a step back from American English is to retreat from the central, core values of American society. You might as well 'step back' from the Bill of Rights or the Pledge of Allegiance.

Language defines a nation. This is why little places like Wales and Cornwall fight so vehemently to protect their dying language from obscurity. Considering that America continues to be such a cultural melting pot of different ethnicities, races, backgrounds and beliefs, it seems more important than ever to have one unifying thing to hold us all together as 'Americans.' And that thing, as far as I'm concerned, is the English language.

Cringe...

"Instead of worrying about whether immigrants can learn English -- they'll learn English -- you need to make sure your child can speak Spanish."

10th July. Remember this date. For me, at least, it's the day Barack Obama's campaign for the presidency 'Jumped the Shark.'

The term 'Jumping the Shark' refers to the tipping point in a long running television, film or comic series. The point where it goes from 'good' to 'dire.' Specifically, a 1977 episode of the popular sitcom Happy Days in which greaser 'The Fonz' jumps over a man eating shark on a pair of water skies - and Happy Days goes from the second most popular show in America to an oft-mocked (and soon cancelled) joke.

Obama's reached that stage, as far as I'm concerned.

I've mentioned many times how frustrated I am with the pandering towards the Spanish language in America. Almost all signs and instructions are written in both English and Spanish and if anybody complains, they're labelled as a 'racist.'

I've run into more and more problems recently. For example, my credit card statements - despite numerous complaints to Bank of America - continue to be delivered in Spanish (Bank of America automatically assume any immigrant has to come from south of the border.)

Yesterday, I bought a new microphone for my computer and the warranty instructions were given to me entirely in Spanish - because that store has very few English speaking customers.

This is not acceptable.

America is an English speaking country - and if Russian, Chinese and Iranian immigrants can manage to learn English when they move here, I fail to understand why Spanish-speaking immigrants are not expected to.

But what's worse - why our potential new president doesn't have a problem with this! In fact, he's ordering (not suggesting, ordering) us to teach our children Spanish.

Bugger that!

Here and now, Mr Obama, let me tell you this... My child will learn French. Not Spanish. French - and if he wants to learn a second language, that's his choice, but I'd recommend Chinese. Or Polish. Or Swahili. Anything other than Spanish.

Why?

Because America's children should not have to be bilingual to live here! America is an English speaking country! As I've repeated ad nauseum, I was expected to learn French when I worked in Paris. Why the hell should it be any different here?

But this is all old news. An argument I've repeated many times before. It's only worth mentioning here because Obama just out and out said what I'd been dreading - that he's pandering to the Hispanic vote by promising them whatever they want to hear.

Which seems to be his stock in trade. Obama talks big and makes broad promises and gullible, foolish people (myself included, until recently) swallow them up.

He tells liberals 'I'm against guns!'

He tells 2nd Amendment nuts 'Your guns are safe with me!'

He's pro choice, pro gay-rights - but doing a better job than centrist-conservative McCain at winning over the evangelical movement (up to 15% are reported to have defected to the Obama camp since the campaign began.)

He comforts the liberals: "This notion that's peddled by the religious right - that they are oppressed is not true. Sometimes it's a cynical ploy to move their agenda ahead. The classic example being that somehow secularists are trying to eliminate Christmas, which strikes me as some kind of manufactured controversy."

H courts the conservatives: "Secularists are wrong when they ask believers to leave their religion at the door before entering into the public square. The majority of great reformers in American history repeatedly used religious language to argue for their cause."

Basically, Barack Obama tells you whatever you want to hear -depending who he's talking to (and hoping neither group compares notes.) It's only when November rolls around that we'll see the true 'colour of his money' (and his real credentials.)

"Change you can believe in."

That's the motto of the Obama campaign - and what a wonderful piece of marketing it is. By pandering to the disgruntled and unsatisfied (which is most of us, let's be honest) he promises the one thing that appeals across the board. 'Change.'

You don't need to quantify this change. You just have to promise it - and we gullible voters will envision whatever it is we want changed (and assume that Obama can give it to us.)

It's only when you start reading between the rhetoric that the hollow shell of Obama's campaign is revealed. In his July 10th speech, Obama promised 'change' alright. He promised to pressure Americans to make their kids learn Spanish - so the continued wave of illegal immigrants he welcomes to this country don't need to.

Bastante es bastante!

Okay, it's time America cut this Spanish-language appeasement crap.

I'm sick to death of it. I'm sick of the fact that Bank of America sends me my credit-card statements in Spanish (despite four complaints I've made) and I'm sick of every sign, leaflet, document and television program having Spanish translations or subtitles.

America is an English speaking country. American-English, to be precise, and if you're expecting to live here, you damn well ought to make a stab at speaking it.

It was Mr Noah Webster, following American Independence, who defined 'American English.' He wrote the essential American dictionary, the Webster's American Dictionary of the English Language.

If I've got to sacrifice my British idioms to fit in here (saying gas instead of petrol, 'zee' instead of 'zed') I don't see why my fellow immigrants feel compelled to demand that Americans accommodate their ignorance of English.

I worked in Paris for four years - and certainly didn't expect to get business done in any language other than French while I was there. When I arrived, I barely spoke a word - but I made the effort to learn. These days, I might not be the most graceful linguist, but I certainly know enough to get complex things done.

Not so our Spanish-speaking friends in America! Vile nationalist organisations like La Raza are promoting the idea that not accommodating Spanish-speakers is racist. What rubbish! By that logic, tourists in New York are being discriminated against daily because signs aren't in French, German or Japanese.

What really gets my goat is the attitude some pro-Spanish speakers have. After gently explaining to one fellow immigrant that I didn't speak a word of Spanish, she snootily responded: 'I think it's rather ignorant not to learn a second language, no?'

Her smile soon faded when I explained my fluency in French - and a basic grasp of German I still vaguely remember.

The fact is, American English defines the United States as much as the Stars and Stripes or Declaration of Independence. When Noah Webster established the spelling and grammar that differentiated American English from it's British cousin, he set a precedent.

"The appropriate standard for the American language," argued Webster, "is the same republican principles as American civil constitutions."

In this belief, Webster created 'Americanized' English, replacing "colour" with "color", substituting "wagon" for "waggon" and printing "center" instead of "centre." He also added newly invented American words, like "skunk" and "squash", that didn't appear in British dictionaries.

He created a new language to suit the newly created American Republic.

In the United States, we rightly celebrate our differences and enjoy an enormous amount of freedom to live the way we choose to. What makes us truly American, however, are not the differences, but the few things we have in common. The English language (or the American version of it) is one of them.

By refusing to learn American English - and demanding that the country accommodate their own language - millions of immigrants are taking the opportunities and freedoms given to them by American society, but refusing to consider themselves a part of it.