Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Militant Ginger rants - Redheaded Men are Bringing Sexy Back

I was narked a while back to hear somebody (who prided themselves on their tolerance and open-mindedness, no less) declare that they "didn't find redheaded men attractive."

And that's fine - I mean, I don't find superficiality attractive, so I guess our feelings of non-attraction were fortuitously mutual - but it did rub me up the wrong way.

Oh, don't get me wrong. We all have 'types' we find attractive. I can't tell you the number of times my head's been turned by a prim, buttoned-up brunette in a tailored blouse - or, conversely, a compact, curvy little Italian/Jewish girl with her hair in a pony tail.

But attraction goes a lot deeper than that. Judging whether or not somebody is attractive is dependent on so many things - and they can and can't cancel each other out.

From a totally superficial standpoint, I might claim not to find overweight women attractive. However, there are more than a couple of overweight women I have found very attractive over the years. Maybe it's because they were pretty, smart, funny, compelling - or maybe even beautiful in a way I simply hadn't considered before. It was an inaccurate assumption (and one I was happy to abandon - I even dated a plus-sized model for a year.)

According to her BMI, this woman is overweight. Does that make her unattractive? Um... No.

Similarly, while I have a definite 'thing' for those prim, buttoned-up brunettes I was talking about, I know a couple I'd gladly throttled rather than share an elevator ride with. Personality and attitude can outweigh looks - but, the opposite is NOT true.

So back to my 'superficial somebody', who declared that they didn't find redheaded men attractive. I challenge - wouldn't that depend on the guy?

Below, I present five redheaded men who are, in my limited and heterosexual perspective, smokin' hot. If the woman who declared 'redheaded men aren't attractive' doesn't feel a tingle about at least one of these examples, she might as well buy a pair of sensible shoes and join a softball team right now (if you catch my drift.)

Sexy Redheads of Our Generation

#1: Prince Harry

The youngest son of Princess Diana, Harry is affectionately known by his squad-mates as 'the ginger bullet magnet.' A tank commander, helicopter pilot, front-line officer in Afghanistan and Polo player extraordinaire, he's basically the closest thing us gingers have to James Bond.

And that's ignoring the fact that he's third in line to the throne. All in all, old Harry is 'kind of a big deal.'

Women love him because he's athletic, attractive and has a wicked streak a mile wide. Unlike his staid and proper older brother (who is a 'king in training' and expected to act like it) Harry is a common site in nightclubs and hotspots around the world - boozing, womanizing and raising all kinds of hell.

Plus, he's got the elixir all women fall for - a tragic past hidden beneath all that boyish bravado. He lost his mother in a fateful car accident in Paris, and has lived in the public eye ever since - with many courting rumors that he's really the illegitimate son of Diana's former lover Major James Hewitt (and in all honesty, the resemblance is remarkable.)

2# Rupert Grint

As Harry Potter's best friend Ron, ginger actor Rupert Grint has become nothing less than an international phenomenon. For every bitchy woman who declares 'redheaded men aren't attractive,' there are three dozen teenage girls writing angsty poetry about how much they 'heart' this particular ginger.

Despite living his teenage years in the Warner Brothers spotlight, and currently owning more money than most of us can imagine, Rupert Grint always comes across as genuine, down-to-earth and just downright lovable. During the filming of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, he bought himself an ice-cream truck and entertained himself between takes churning out Mr Whippy for the film crew.

And if there are any further doubts, remember this: He's the one who got to snog Emma Watson in the final Harry Potter film. I rest my case.

#3 Paul Bettany

If you like your redheaded hotties a little closer to the legal age of consent, how about well-seasoned star Paul Bettany. This BAFTA award winning actor is most famous for trudging about in the buff in 2001's A Knight's Tale - which might explain his popularity with the ladies.

There are all sorts of reasons women like Bettany - his easy charm, piercing gaze or even his dulcet tones (which earned him the voice role of Tony Stark's supercomputer J.A.R.V.I.S. in the Iron Man movies.) Some, at the risk of sounding superficial, might have been partial to the impressive six-pack he sported in the supernatural thriller Legion.

Whatever the reason, this redhead's got it going on. Need further proof? How about the fact that he's married to Jennifer Connelly. Yes, Jennifer freakin' Connelly - only one of the most unequivocally attractive women ever to grace the silver screen.

Paul Bettany is married to this smoldering goddess. Case closed.

So for my friend who declared that 'redheaded men aren't attractive?' Jennifer Connelly disagrees with you - and you're no Jennifer Connelly.

#4 Damien Lewis

No, I don't know who he is either - but apparently I'm in the minority.

Yet in what I euphemistically classify as 'the research' I did for this piece, his name kept coming up amongst the girls I talked to. Apparently many of them seemed to have a thing for this British actor, star of HBO's Band of Brothers.

I guess it's not difficult to see why - he's rugged, athletic and has a certain toughness about him that sets him apart from more 'gentlemanly' gingers like Paul Bettany. His most commonly celebrated feature, apparently, are his icy blue eyes - which reportedly make girls 'swoon.'

#5 Eric Stoltz

Star of SyFy's show Caprica, the venerable Eric Stoltz looks pretty well preserved considering he's approaching his forth generation of acting. The original Marty McFly (until he was replaced by Micheal J. Fox) he's also stared in Memphis Belle, Pulp Fiction, Jerry Maguire and a litany of other movies. He's almost as much of a Hollywood fixture as the Walk of Stars.

He's also considered something of a hottie.

Oh, maybe not in the Brad Pitt or George Clooney category, but he's got more than his share of fans. My Internet investigation turned up comments like: "Eric Stoltz is KILLER SEXY' and "How cute is he? Seriously?"

Maybe it's something to do with the careful balance he's achieved; stuck somewhere between 'boyish' and 'worn in.' Maybe it's the passion he injects into his work - he plays a fantastic mad scientist in Caprica. Perhaps it's just the fact that he looks damn good in a suit.

Of course, there are plenty of other redheaded hotties - and just how hot they are is the subject of much discussion.

Runners up for this article included Conan O'Brien, who has more than his share of female fans. CSI Miami star David Caruso was also considered - he was once the quintessential ginger heartthrob - but is now more likely to be mocked for his overly dramatic turn as detective Horatio Caine (nevertheless, a lot of ladies get a bit squirmy at the thought of him.)

Nevertheless, I think I've made my point: Red hair is only as unattractive as the guy it's attached to.

A superficial statement like 'redheaded men aren't attractive' is utterly laudable given the fact that there are plenty of highly attractive redheaded men out there - and the redheads who are unattractive would arguably still be so if their hair magically turned blond or black.

My attitude towards the woman who declares that she doesn't find redheaded men attractive? It's your loss, baby. You have no idea what you're missing out on.


Expat mum said...

Still trying to figure out who Harry looks like....

Susanne said...

I agree. Hair color is so shallow a reason to reject someone. All sorts of people are beautiful,in my opinion. Oh and I like that picture of you. You could easily make that top 5 list of ginger guys you pictured. Of those, I like Harry the best. Harry Wales... :)

Joanna Cake said...

Damien Lewis is divine! Not so keen on the other guys but there are a couple of ginger dads around town who are gorgeous.

Joanna Cake said...

PS, You're not so unkind on the eye yourself ;P

Zachary said...

i love red headed men! i'd have a collection of them... if my redheaded husband would only let me!

Siobhan Prigent said...

I find (in general) more ginger-haired men attractive than any other "type". I in fact only found this site because I was looking for a new hot pic of Damien Lewis (so thanks for that!). One minor thing: bless him, but he's actually quite posh, probably more so than Prince Harry (he went to Eaton for goodness sake), so his write up here isn't right. He is still number one on the Sexy list though!!!

Roland Hulme said...

Siobhan! Interesting - I didn't know that about him. Just caught him in another film - Your Highness - and he seemed pretty aristocratic (given that he was playing a ginger baddie.)