Object of Desire II

Modern British sports cars are designed with lighter-than-air, hand-assembled and epoxy glued aluminium chassis components.

German manufacturers file more patents each year than NASA.

And the American car industry? It continues to churn out vehicles that belong in the 1950's.

Take Ford for example.

Their model line-up includes the famous Ford Crown Victoria and it's re-badged twin brother, the Mercury Grand Marquis. Detroit's still churning out these cars despite the fact that they're designed the same way cars were during World War Two.

A separate chassis and body. Dependable and rugged rear wheel drive. A powerful and unsophisticated engine.

Body styles and features had changed and evolved, but the basic components haven't. That's why the Haynes manual for my Lincoln Town Car - pretty much a Ford Crown Victoria with a different body - covers all models from 1970 through 2005.

There's nothing fancy or clever about these cars, but they're still immensely popular. Whatever the limitations of the chassis/body layout, the bugs and issues have long been ironed out and the result is a pretty damn solid vehicle.

Which is why I've fallen for it.

I've really enjoyed the way my Lincoln drives, with it's heavy, well-balanced body and that predictable rear-wheel drive. The lazy engine has enough power to heft two tons pretty darn quickly when needed to and the layout of the car - with it's enormous boot and ample space - is ridiculously practical. I love it.

And now I've got the American car bug, I've seen what I really want.

Surprisingly, it's not an antique. In fact, the car I've got my eye on is a late model Ford Crown Victoria Police Interceptor.


They made them in enormous quantities and they can be picked up astonishingly cheaply. Most cars carry hefty mileage - but that Ford drive-train runs hassle-free for at least half-a-million miles.

These cars were built to withstand the punishment of serving the state. The Interceptor package comes standard with uprated nitrogen gas shock-absorbers, reinforced suspension and body-frame and over-sized all-season tyres. With rugged transmission and engine oil coolers - plus a 3.27 rear axle - the Crown Vic can do 129mph without breaking a sweat.

So it's fast and as agile as a two ton workhorse can be. Even better, it's a solid old bird. With an optional Rhino Push Bar (a snip at $100) the police coolly nudge offending vehicles off the road day after day. Front impact safety ratings are five star - not much Germany churns out can match that.

Really, you've got a fast, rugged tank on wheels. A serious bit of motor.

But the thing I really love about the late model Crown Victorias? The fact that they exactly resemble unmarked police cars. Add that optional push bar (those things are illegal in England) and you've got the sort of car nobody cuts up, beeps at or blocks in.

Finally - protection from the terrible and selfish American drivers.

This is the car I'm saving my pennies for now.