How to Deep Fry Steak

America is awesome for many reasons, but foremost amongst them must be their cheap and delicious slabs of beef. Nothing beats a proper bit of American steak.

However, if you're a man of modest means, such as myself, it's often difficult to give a steak the sizzle it deserves.

If you've got a lovely slab of rump, for example, it deserves better than being squished in a George Foreman grill or slung into an anemic electric broiler.

So yesterday, I discovered the best way to cook moist, tender and delicious steak at home: Deep fry it!

I know it sounds crazy, but it works. Yesterday, I fried up two utterly delicious steaks that were crisp and charcoaly on the outside, yet red and juicy in the center. Steakhouse-style steaks, as opposed to the bloody, uncooked flesh or the charred boot-leather my cooking normally transforms them into.

But how do you deep fry a steak? Well, I'm here to tell you.

You will need:

• Two good quality steaks, cut to about 1" in width.
• A wok or frying pan, big enough to cook both steaks in.
• Enough vegetable oil to submerge both steaks in.
• Pancake mix (yep, the Aunt Jemima stuff you mix with water.)
• Adobo (the salty peppery seasoning Hispanic people cook everything with.)
• Utensils to immerse and remove sizzling steaks from hot oil (fingers not recommended!)

First, pour the oil into the pan and begin heating it. You'll need to get the oil to about 350 degrees (good 'n hot) before you put the steaks in it.

While you're heating the oil, take the two steaks and cover them liberally with Adobo. It should stick to the moist meat. Then cover the steaks in a thin layer of pancake mix powder (that should stick to the meat as well.)

When the oil has reached 350 degrees, gently place both steaks into the oil with a utensil (don't just drop them in, or you'll splatter burning-hot oil everywhere.)

Start timing - for a medium-rare steak, you should let them fry for no more than 4 minutes. Adjust the timing by a minute either way for rare or well-done. Half way through (two minutes, for me) use the utensil to turn the steaks over in the hot oil.

When you hit the four minute mark, gently fish the steaks out of the oil and place on a plate (maybe with a sheet of kitchen roll to soak up the oil.)

Voila! Two deliciously flavorsome steaks cooked to absolute perfection!

Make sure you dispose of the oil sensibly (leave it to cool down and don't pour it down the sink) and be aware that these utterly delicious steaks have about a million grams of saturated fat and seventy zillion milligrams of sodium in them. That's why they taste so good!

Enjoy!