Tuesday, September 09, 2008

How to Survive a Terminator

Last night's episode of the The Sarah Connor Chronicles gave us some handy hints if we ever have to face off against a merciless metal killing machine:
  • Terminators can run as fast as speeding motor car - but if you're injured, they'll only follow you very, very slowly.
  • Terminators are tough enough to survive being squished between two fast-moving Mack trucks. However, they can also be disabled by an alarm clock in a bucket of water.
  • Terminators shoplift regularly. If you own a 7/11, you should stick a sign in the window saying 'No more than two Terminators at a time allowed in store.'
  • Hispanic churches give sanctury to bleeding, beaten, heavily armed fugitives with no questions asked, as long as they speak Spanish. (Oh, wait, this one's accurate.)
  • You can repair a malfunctioning Terminator by scraping the gunk out of it's brain circuit.

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