Two More Days...

...of 2008.

What a year!

If my life was a television series, this season would have been the one that planted all the plot-seeds for the exciting season yet to come. 2008 saw the arrival of El Bambino Boozer, which is surely going to be the start of a lifetime of adventure. It also saw me finally kick the chocks out and start taxiing down the runway towards the lift-off of some kind of writing career.

This is the year I turned 30 years old, which is an utterly terrifying milestone. It's also the year America's first black president was elected, a man was cured of AIDS, OJ Simpson finally went to jail (rightly or wrongly) and the illusion of democracy in Britain and the European Union pretty much evaporated.

This year I finally got my mitts on my dream car - and then sold it again. It was the first year since 2000 that I didn't cross international borders. It was the year of my fifth (can you believe it) wedding anniversary. It was the year I discovered that you can make a baby laugh hysterically by throwing him up in the air and catching him again.

It was a year in which a ton of stuff happened, but most importantly, it was the year in which I realised a ton more stuff was going to happen as a result.

As Frank Sinatra would have said: "It was a very good year."

The Reality in the White House

Vanity Fair is saying goodbye to the current White House staff, and getting some insight into what life with President Bush was really like:

"David Kuo, who served as deputy director of the White House Office of Faith-Based and Community Initiatives, disputed the idea that the Bush White House was dominated by religious conservatives and catered to the needs of a religious right voting bloc.

"The reality in the White House is — if you look at the most senior staff — you're seeing people who aren't personally religious and have no particular affection for people who are religious-right leaders," Kuo said.

"In the political affairs shop in particular, you saw a lot of people who just rolled their eyes at basically every religious-right leader that was out there, because they just found them annoying and insufferable. These guys were pains in the butt who had to be accommodated."

American Pie was right!

Many Teens Don't Keep Virginity Pledges

by Steven Reinberg
(HealthDay News)

Teens who take virginity pledges are just as likely to have sex as teens who don't make such promises -- and they're less likely to practice safe sex to prevent disease or pregnancy, a new study finds. Full story here.

So, the $200 million George Bush ticked off for 'abstinence only' sex education turned out to be a complete waste of money? And the conservative movement is again proven to be talking out of their derrieres? Quelle surprise!

I'm all for sex education programs recommending that kids don't have sex before marriage - but only if they're backed by full and explicit instructions on how to avoid catching diseases or getting pregnant if they do decide to get busy. Which some of them will - because they're teenagers, after all.

Additional point for Guns = Bad

Police: Pa. man shot for making noise during movie

By MARYCLAIRE DALE, Associated Press Writer

PHILADELPHIA – A man enraged by a noisy family sitting near him in a movie theater on Christmas night shot the father of the family in the arm, police said. Full story here.

So, does anybody else need convincing that most people who carry/own/love guns are basically the LAST people on the planet who should be let near them?

Although, let's be honest. We've all wished we could blow a hole in the noisy idiots in the movie theater.

Merry Christmas?

Child greeting 'Santa' was first victim, police say

LOS ANGELES, California (CNN) -- Dressed as Santa, Bruce Jeffrey Pardo walked up to his ex-in-laws' home in Covina, California, on Christmas Eve and knocked on the door.

An 8-year-old girl, elated to see Santa, ran toward the door.

That's when, police say, Pardo lifted a gun and shot her in the face.

Full story here...

I really haven't been able to pull out all that many heart-warming Christmas stories this year - it turns out, it's not that sort of a Christmas.

This story is especially sad - after losing his job and his wife, a former Church Usher bought five handguns, built a home-made flame-thrower and went around to is former in-law's house on Christmas Eve intending to slaughter them.

He shot dead eight guests and attempted to torch the house - that planning being partially foiled when his flamethrower exploded, burning him horribly and fusing his Santa suit to his body.

In terrible pain, he drove to his brother's house, where he killed himself with a gunshot to the head - only after first booby-trapping his car and suit to explode should police investigate it. The car actually detonated - fortunately, nobody was hurt.

What really got me about the story was reading this:

A search of Pardo's own home in Montrose, a suburb northeast of Los Angeles, turned up racing fuel, five empty boxes for high-powered semi-automatic handguns and two high-powered shotguns.

This suggests that, just like the Virginia Tech gunman, Pardo legally purchased all the weapons he used to execute his former in-laws. I can't wait to see how the gun-nuts and NRA members try to justify this.

I've gone back and forth on the issue of private ownership of handguns. My opinion that most private gun owners are the LAST people who should be owning guns has not been softened by comments on my blog such as this:

I love guns, but then again I'm a former infantry Marine and not a liberal c*nt like a lot of you on this blog.

Too many gun-owners are 'gun nuts.' People who fetishize weapons with an almost sexual fervor. People whose obsession with these deadly little toys is, frankly, creepy.

Don't get me wrong. I 'get it.' After watching gangs of thugs ransack and rape their way through New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina, I can understand why home owners might want to have a single gun, locked somewhere secure for the unlikely event that they really need to defend themselves.

But beyond that, unless you hunt, I don't really think there's much reason for the average person to own more than one gun for 'home defence.' For example, I think if you have more than three handguns, you've moved from 'gun owner,' straight past 'collector' and into the realms of 'one man militia.'

Just to clarify, I do think the 2nd Amendment is pretty explicit and I don't think we need to go to the extremes that we have in England (where only criminals have guns - and the rate of gun crime has more than tripled since handguns were banned.)

But considering, in the last year, I've posted stories about a four year-old shooting themselves in Sam's Club and an eight year-old getting machine-gunned in the head at a gun fair, I think one very serious criticism needs to be leveled at the pro-gun crowd and they need to stop flapping their jaws and actually answer the charges:

Innocent children are getting killed in gun-related accidents. Legally purchased handguns are being used to commit massacres. There is something deeply wrong with this picture.

It's time the pro-gun crowd got their act together. For Christ's sake, they need to stop bleating about 'their' rights and start working to protect the rights of the people killed and wounded by their obsessive desire to maintain accessibility to handguns.

Basically: If the pro-handgun crowd can't keep their house in order, they're going to empower the 'liberal c*nts' like us to take away their guns - because they'd have demonstrated that they don't have the capacity to own them safely or responsibly.

I think in another couple of years, there's going to be a public backlash against private gun ownership. I wouldn't be surprised if somebody from a family victimised by gun crime sued the NRA, or another politically-motived pro-gun lobby, arguing that defence of private gun ownership creates an environment which endangers public safety.

In the right political atmosphere, it could be as big as the court-cases against 'big tobacco,' blaming them for endangering public safety by knowlingly peddling an addictive product that caused lung cancer.

But before the pro-gun lobby pitch a fit - they shouldn't worry. The tabacco industry might have lost millions in those court cases, but you can still buy a packet of Paliaments anywhere in the country. I think it's fair to assume that whatever happens, private gun ownership will be here for a long time to come - and we'll be reading a lot more tragic stories like the ones posted above.

Christmas 2008

But the tree belongs outside, no?

OMG! PRESENT?

OMG! PRESENT? (Take 2)

Happy (Christ)Mass

I have been playing a game over the last few days - it's called 'Happy or Merry?'

The rules are simple; when encountering somebody during this festive season, you have to guess whether to wish them 'Merry Christmas' or the more politically-correct 'Happy Holidays.'

In multicultural America - especially in New York, where you'll find more Jews than in Tel Aviv - it's a bit of a gamble. Fortunately, I've become pretty good at it. The other day, I spotted a potential 'Merry Christmas' behind the counter at the Post Office - merely because she was wearing a gigantic 'Jesus' badge.

However, astronomers have determined that if Jesus was a real person, he was most likely born in June, meaning the festival of Christmas has very little to do with the Son of God at all.

People theorize that budding Christians hijacked the date to coincide with the Roman Dies Natalis Solis Invicti, (the festival of Sol, the invincible sun god) and the Winter Solstice - basically meaning missionaries could lure pagans to their religion by saying: "Dude, check it out, we have a religious festival JUST LIKE YOURS. And it's at the same time, too; so you only need to buy one lot of decorations."

But regardless of it's religious roots, or whether you call it Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or Festivus, the general principle remains the same. Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men, all that jazz.

Unfortunately, this year, the festival spirit seems to have been victim to the same shortcomings as the economy. Take Peace on Earth, for example. Right now, Palestinians are bombarding Israel with rockets and mortars. Merry bloody Christmas!

As for Goodwill to Men - check out how much 'goodwill' resulted from Bernard Madoff's complicated 'Ponzi' scheme. The The Elie Wiesel Foundation for Humanity lost all it's assets and poor Rene-Thierry Magon de la Villehuchet lost so much of his client's money, he found the only answer to be sleeping pills and a box cutter behind the locked door of his Madison Avenue office.

But if you want to see the most ironic lack of the Christmas spirit, just look towards California - where not content with banning gay marriage, Proposition 8 activists want to nullify 18,000 same-sex marriages.

These mostly 'Christian' people don't know any of the nearly twenty-thousand same-sex couples. They don't know their life story, their reasons for wanting to enter into a committed relationship nor their motivation for wanting it to be legally recognized. All these self-righteous idiots know is that their life will somehow be improved by ruining the lives of twenty-thousand people they don't even know.

If that's what Christianity stands for, no wonder they feel there's a 'war on Christmas.' But just like Hezbollah whining that the Israeli response to their rocket attacks was 'disproportionate,' these embattled Christians fail to grasp that they're the ones who started the conflict.

But perhaps we should all try to adopt some of the holiday spirit and overlook our differences for the next few days. So, if you're about to launch a rocket attack, or tear asunder a committed relationship, take a deep breath and hold off until the new year.

After all, it's Christmas/ Hanukkah / Kwanzaa / Festivus / Winter Solstice (delete as appropriate.)

Christmas List: Part 2

Continuing on from this post, I'm going to be dishing out my hypothetical xmas pressies to the much appreciated members of my blogroll!

Kali's ADD blog! - Kali is an enigma. She's a New Yorker, a wildly talented writer and actress and yet is, inexplicably, also something a conservative! I think I put her nose out of joint with some of my more disgustingly liberal posts. To make amends, I think she'd enjoy this: An American Carol. This movie looks HILARIOUS, but isn't out on DVD yet. When it is, though, you can be sure I'll be watching it - and apparently, it's a 'conservative' comedy, so I think Kali will get a giggle from it, too.

Kilted Travel Agent - Ah, the international man of mystery himself, who is also the spouse of the lovely Paisley Penguin. I'd get him the latest Bond book - Devil May Care by Sebastian Faulks. It's a cracker - you can read my review of it here.

Kimmy's blog - Kimmy's just started an epic addition to her beautiful house, so my Christmas present to her would be a 'tasteful' Friendly Faces Moose Trophy to brighten up the new room! Don't worry, I know it says it's stuffed, but not in the way most Maine hunters would imagine.

Kiss N Tell Confessions - For Christine, I'd buy her a very unimaginative present, but I think she'd appreciate it - a 60 day subscription to World of Warcraft. Wifey and I have both looked at this game, but we know it'd be like virtual crack and we'd both get addicted if we started playing - not that we have any time with Baby Boozer to look after!

Kitty's Bloggy Bits - Kitty's just started sewing a new line of bags, so I thought she might appreciate this guide to Making Vintage Bags. Poor old thing. She's practically a one woman sweatshop! It's her own fault though - she makes such nice things everybody wants them.

Laura Parish - First off, Laura's VERY naughty for not updating her blog more. Secondly, I'd buy this budding author Will Write for Shoes, Cathy Yardley's much touted guide to writing a chick-lit novel. I expect to see the first draft shortly, Ms. Parish!

Mommy Has a Headache - As I've done with my other creative chums, I wouldn't buy Emma K a single thing. Instead, I'd make sure to buy all my suitably-inclined friends a copy of her rip-roaring Black Lace book, Lured by Lust (written under the tempting pseudonym of Tania Picarda.)

Mostly Lisa - What do you buy the ultimate Apple-addict? Clearly, a teeny-tiny (she is a model, after all) t-shirt that proudly reads: "Hello. I'm a MAC."

Why The Spirit will Suck...

I can't claim to be a huge comic-book aficionado, but there was one comic icon I particularly liked: The Spirit.


Drawn by the acclaimed comic book artist Will Eisner, The Spirit was more hard-boiled detective than superhero. He was just a regular guy who'd been left for dead when doused in a chemical concoction. Waking up hours later in the cemetery, he donned a domino mask and gloves and decided to fight crime under the anonymous identity of The Spirit.

The Spirit appealed to me because he was like the literary incarnations of James Bond and The Saint. He was a tough, clever guy, but he was just a regular guy.

He got beaten up, shot, stabbed, battered, broken and burnt in his quest to clean up the city - and we saw not just his injuries, but the aftermath as well.

Despite being a formidable fighter, brilliant detective and a bit of a charmer, The Spirit was the superhero any of us could imagine being... It made his offbeat comic adventures very easy to get immersed in.

So understanding my love of The Spirit, you can understand my disappointment when Frank Miller, the man behind Sin City, got his mitts on the franchise. Before you knew it, he'd produced this:



I don't know where to begin with this travesty.

Frank Miller, arguably a very talented comic-book writer in his own right, clearly doesn't get The Spirit at all. No longer is he the tough, charming but achingly human character he was in the comics. Suddenly he's jumping from rooftop to rooftop like a superhero, filled with superhuman strength and speed...

Frank - a word in your ear... Superhuman agility, speed and strength kind of make it easy to be a superhero. It also kind of reduces the element of suspense. The whole point of The Spirit was that he was a regular guy, not Batman in a business suit. I mean, I know you wrote the seminal Batman comic, The Dark Knight... But Christ, get over yourself, Frank Miller.

While we're at it... The cinematography? Why does The Spirit look like Sin City 2? The same style, the same sets... Practically the same trailer. I wouldn't mind so much, but you're already making Sin City 2. Couldn't you have just stuck with that and, I don't know, tried to do something different with The Spirit?

Here's a crazy suggestion - pick up the original comic books and use those for inspiration.

I could go on... The Spirit's femme fatales all seem like clones of the Sin City 'dames'... The villainous Octopus - traditionally portrayed in the comics by a single pair of white gloves - is suddenly Samuel L. Jackson dressed like a pimp... It's just.... It's just AWFUL!

I certainly won't be going to see it when it comes out. I'm just disappointed that people are going to see the onscreen action and think that they're watching The Spirit... It's just like the '97 movie version of the The Saint... A big, fat Hollywood joke with the punchline being a kick in the teeth for the fans of the original material.

Behead the Gays!

So I don't care if you disagree with gay marriage, or think that gays shouldn't be allowed to serve in the military. Even if you do, you'd agree that the following is pretty indefensible:

US balks at backing condemnation of anti-gay laws
By DAVID CRARY, Fri Dec 19, 12:08 am ET

UNITED NATIONS – Alone among major Western nations, the United States has refused to sign a declaration presented Thursday at the United Nations calling for worldwide decriminalization of homosexuality. Full story HERE.

In the Middle East, you can have your head cut off for being gay... And the United States is saying that they're not entirely comfortable condemning that.

Ironically, it's pressure from the Evangelical right and the Vatican that probably led to the US making this decision. The only countries that are joining them in refusing to condemn punishing the 'crime' of homosexuality are the fundamentalist Islamic countries (most of whom are the ones this declaration is specifically targeting.)

Isn't it funny how it's the ultra-religious groups who always fight tooth and nail to deny people their basic human rights? I mean, let's not forget that it was the Evangelicals and Baptists sixty years ago who were fighting to stop interracial marriage and civil rights. They'd rather side with Islamic fundamentalists (you know, the ones who are out to destroy 'the great Satan' of America) than 'those darn queers.'

On this occasion, you don't have to agree with gay marriage, or even agree with 'gay' as a lifestyle. But you have to agree that America's made a whopping error in judgment.

Just look at the 'team' we've picked to be part of. Saudi Arabia, Iran... These are all countries that criminalize homosexuality and WE decided to stick on their side.

Wasn't it the Bible which said: '...and ye shall judge them by the company they keep?'

Sorry, Nicole. The Buffett's closed.

"The perfect amount of money to leave to your children is enough so they feel they could do anything, but not so much that they feel they could do nothing."

Warren Buffet, 29 September 1986.

I've been learning a lot about Warren Buffett recently.

The second richest man in America is a bit of an oddity. Despite having a personal fortune worth over $60 billion, he makes an intense effort to live 'normally.'

The 78 year old still lives in the same modest Nebraska home he bought in 1958 and is vocal about his opposition to the 'ovarian lottery' which creates 'dynastic wealth.'

Buffett had to earn his money, and accuses those who grow up in wealthy circumstances of being merely "members of the lucky sperm club." His contempt for the likes of heiress Paris Hilton is palpable!

But it turns out that you can't be incredibly wealthy without finding a Paris Hilton somewhere within your own family - and in Buffett's case, her name is Nicole - his youngest son's adopted daughter.

This 32 year-old 'abstract painter' lives in the liberal community of Berkeley, California and if this article in Marie Claire is anything to go by, a more ungrateful, undeserving brat you'd be hard pressed to find.

Marie Claire tells a tale of woe:

"What's it like when your grandpa is the richest man in the world? For Nicole Buffett, it means forgoing cable TV and health insurance and making do on $40,000 a year."

Excuse me while I spurt my coffee across my keyboard.

According to the 2006 Census figures (and household incomes have declined since then) the average income in America is $35,499 dollars. The vast majority of those people can afford cable TV and health insurance - in fact, they don't have any choice!

Nicole's 'making do' on five grand more than the average American, so perhaps she shouldn't be complaining about it!

But poor old Nicole has a different story to that of the average American. While they go to work for minimum wage, struggling to pay bills and make ends meet, she lives in an artistic colony in a California college-town - struggling to make it as an artist (instead of just struggling to 'make it' like regular folk.)


She is able to sell her paintings for as much as $8,000 apiece (arguably only thanks to her famous name) and therefore doesn't feel compelled to go out and get a real job like the rest of us (hence why she doesn't have health insurance, even though she could afford it.)

"I've been very blessed to have my education taken care of, and I have had my living expenses taken care of while I'm in school," she boasted in the documentary "The One Percent," an examination of the lives of rich families.

However, following that expensive education, she clearly felt entitled to continue to be supported by her wealthy grandfather:

"It would be nice to be involved with creating things with all that money," she said on the Oprah Winfrey show. "But I feel completely excluded from it."

Ironically, Nicole Buffett's done wonderfully thanks to her adopted grandfather's money. She enjoyed a top-notch liberal arts education most Americans would be unable to afford. Then, instead of joining the 'real world,' she's managed to make an arguably comfortable living as an artist.

Living in New York, I know plenty of struggling creative people who'd think their dreams had come true if they got to earn $40,000 a year painting pictures!

But instead, Nicole Buffett demonstrates - and Marie Claire advocates - this curiously American phenomenon of pretty girls developing a totally undeserved sense of entitlement.

Nicole Buffett lives well - better than the majority of Americans. Yet because of the family name her mother married into (however briefly - she divorced Peter Buffett in 1993) Nicole feels she deserves to live the millionaire's lifestyle, without doing anything to deserve it.

Somewhat ironically, the Marie Claire article ends with a defiant statement that's in complete contradiction to everything she said previously:

"I will always be self-reliant," she says, curled up on her couch, her dreadlocks draping her body like a quilt. "Grandpa taught me that, and it has set the tone for my life."

You can see her art at Nicole's website, HERE.

Christmas List: Part One

Admittedly, she had no idea I was planning this, but I still accuse Meghan of precognitive plagiarism for her post ripping off my Christmas Blogger List.

The idea is simple. Unfortunately, being poor and half-Scottish, I'm both broke and cheap. Therefore, I can't afford to send each of my blogging pals the gift they so richly deserve.

However, in the holiday spirit, I'm going to tell each of the 'blends' (portmanteau of 'blogger' and 'friend'... don't blame me, I didn't invent it) on my 'blogroll' what I would get them if I was totally rich and loaded.

So Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah!

This is Part One. I have a chubby blogroll, so if you don't see your name this time around, check back for Part Two of my Christmas list, coming soon!

An Uneducated Housewife's Guide to Politics - Coffee Bean's been really open and engaging about her Christian faith over the last year, even facing off against a Godless heathen like me! For that reason, I'd like to give her a book called The Shack, by William P. Young, which tackles the question which challenges all faithful people - how can a 'good' God let bad things happen?

BiPolar Blog - I had considered buying Sha a copy of Kate Perry's greatest hits (and a large hammer) but instead, I thought she'd get a giggle out of a book she mentioned in one of her blog posts - The Pop-Up Book of Sex!

Brit Gal in the USA - For my favorite Oklahoma Expat, I thought she might appreciate a copy of one of my favorites - in fact, the only cook book I own. Great British Dinners by TV chef (and Winchester resident) James Martin. I'm sure she's already educated her cowboy hubby about the Full English Breakfast, but there are some quintessentially British treats in here even she might have forgotten!

Cindy Lynn Speer's blog - I hope Cindy won't take any offence at me calling her the quintessential Renaissance Babe. She's a sword-wielding, Renn-Fairing lass who's also a darn talented aspiring author. From reading her stuff, I thought she might like A Darkness Forged in Fire by Chris Evans (not the star of The Fantastic Four OR the British celebrity ginger.) Evan's book is a startlingly original fantasy novel, updating swords and sorcery to muskets and magic.

CK's Blog - CK and I don't agree on much - but when I heard about Mike Huckabee's new book, I thought it might be something we could both find some middle ground on. Do The Right Thing is Mike Huckabee's answer to solving some of America's problems. The suggestion to 'treat other people as you'd like to be treated' illustrates a practical application of Christian theology that even I don't get my knickers in a twist about.

Cruel Virgin's Blog - It's difficult to pick something for Cruel Virgin as most of the stuff she talks about, she's already read and reviewed. So I'll just pick a product that she left a very deep and thoughtful review of. Maybe she can give it to a friend, or have a spare copy to leave on the coffee table. The Illuminated Bible. And here's her review of it.

Dina: Worrier Princess - For some reason, I imagined darling Dina would enjoy some holiday hijinks courtesy of Mamma Mia. It's sunny escapism with Pierce Brosnan and Colin Firth and I'm sure they two gentlemen Dina would welcome to find in her Christmas stocking!

Erica Henderson - I wouldn't buy Erica anything. NOT A THING. Instead, I'd just buy everybody I know cards from her awesome online shop.

Essin' Em - Essin' Em's left herself a wishlist, which makes picking pressies easy. I'd choose for her something I'd want for myself. As soon as I saw the Harry Potter Monster Book of Monsters plush toy (it's a stuffed-toy version of the man eating book from Prisoner of Azkaban) I thought: 'I WANT ONE OF THOSE!'

Expat Mum, author of Rules Britannia - Similar to Erica Henderson, I wouldn't buy Expat Mum anything. Instead, I'd buy every American I know a copy of her wonderful book, Rules, Britannia: An Insider's Guide to Life in the United Kingdom.

Filmmaker MA Shumin's blog - Shumin is a wonderfully talented writer and filmmaker and one of the most cosmopolitan people I know. She's just fascinated by uncovering the hidden story beneath the surface and discovering more about different people and their cultures. Now , I know she's a fan of Catherine Sanderson's Petite Anglaise, so I'd buy her a copy of the far superior A Year in the Merde by Stephen Clarke.

Jenn of the Jungle RIGHT WING political blog - She's a true tough-talkin' lady, so I think the lovely Jenn would appreciate this book by straight-shooting and hugely entertaining country singer Trace Adkins. A Personal Stand contains the opinions and observations of a rough-around-the-edges, but witty and ultimately very clever man.

Jo's Haunted Eyeball - I secretly think Jo shares my belief that, one day, the zombies will show up and eat all our brains. Therefore, since Winchester is simply surrounded by graveyards, I'd slip her a copy of The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks, which promises to offer 'Complete Protection from the Living Dead.' We can only hope!

Jodiferous: Faster, Pussycat... Type, Type! I would give Jodi the inestimable Michel Thomas' Guide to Speaking Russian. If she doesn't understand why, then it's officially time for her to update her 101 Things About Me section of her blog!

Meghan's Pirate Blog - I've definitely lived vicariously through single and sassy Meghan's adventures over the past year. I think she's get a kick out of this book for Christmas: Hot Chicks with Douchebags.

The Wonderful World of Weiners - Oh, for dear old Hallie, I just had to get this cozy murder mystery, Murder Can Depress Your Dachshund by Selma Eichler. It'd be just the silly escapism she needs, curled up on the sofa with her wieners, full after a big Christmas meal!

You Like Ashley - amazing photographer Ashley Strassburger - Ashley is just the most AMAZING photographer, so I would buy her an Apple MacBook Air. Apple Macs are meant to be insanely good for handling photographs and the Air weighs about as much as a candy bar, so it'd be perfect for Ashley's lifestyle (since she's always travelling cross country.)

The 10 Big Lies About America by Michael Medved

The 10 Big Lies About America:
Combating Destructive Distortions About Our Nation
by Micheal Medved

As a historian, I take rather a morbid interest in the increasing popularity of 'revisionist history' - the reinvention of commonly accepted history to advocate a particular political position.

That's what turned me on to conservative talk show host Michael Medved's latest book, '10 Big Lies About America.' Does this book have valid points to make about the history of the United States? Or is it just a cynical attempt to lift the 'White Man's Burden' of politically correct guilt?

In '10 Big Lies', Medved outlines the 'truth' behind America's history. He reexamines the slave trade, the genocide of the Native Americans and America's secular roots.

He accuses 'universities, public schools' and the old favorite, 'the liberal elite' of popularizing historical accounts that 'blame America' for some of the more controversial chapters in this nation's history.

As Random House boast: "In The 10 Big Lies About America, Medved pinpoints the most pernicious pieces of America-bashing disinformation that pollute current debates about the economy, race, religion in politics, the Iraq war, and other contentious issues."

I will admit, I am immediately suspicious of any book penned by a 'conservative talk show host' that has the word 'America' in the title. But do Medved's theories hold any water?

The book kicks off by attacking the accusation that white men committed genocide against the Native Americans, wiping out over 12 million 'Red Indians' as they settled out west.

Medved certainly debunks a few commonly accepted myths, like the story of the 'smallpox infected blankets' handed out by British troops to the Delaware and Shawnee Indians during the Siege of Fort Pitt.

However, even he can't change the historical facts - and his cynical observation that the Native American population has exploded since 1900 (after the survivors were neatly billeted in their twee reservations) comes across as smug and unrepentant.

The most controversial chapter of Medved's book addresses slavery. He angrily attacks the perception that America was uniquely guilty of the crime of slavery, pointing out that America was responsible for less than 5% of the 'slave trade.'

However, that statement ignores the fact that America removed itself from the slave trade by breeding it's own 'property class.' America then continued the abominable industry long after the rest of the civilized world had abandoned it.

Medved even goes as far as to suggest that slaves were 'better off in America than Africa.' How any readers could fail to find that statement offensive is beyond me!

Further on his list of 'big lies,' we find some of the popular conservative positions being touted, like attacking claims that America was founded as a secular nation.

Medved quite rightly points out the Christian convictions of many of the founding fathers. However, like with his attacks on slavery and the plight of the Native Americans, he's quickly reduced to simply ignoring further evidence, which disproves his dogmatic theories.

For example, he ignores that fact that the founding fathers ratified: "The Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion."

Medved similarly fails to point that that, while the Declaration of Independence and the Bill of Rights make reference to 'God' and a 'Creator,' they never once make reference to Christianity or Jesus.

In the end, Michael's Medved's book reads like a shopping list of conservative political opinion, mixed with rather distasteful 'white pride' style propaganda. I guess I can see where he's coming from - in modern America, political correctness has rendered the 'White Man's Burden' to that of guilt. However, it still leaves rather a nasty taste in my mouth.

But if you're a white, Judeo-Christian American looking to feel better about your nation's history, this book will tell you everything you want to hear.

It's only if you have the remotest interest in real history that this book will leave you feeling icky. As a former history student, I think Michael Medved picked a very appropriate title when he chose to call his book: 'The 10 Big Lies About America.'

That's exactly what he's written.

The 10 Big Lies About America: Combating Destructive Distortions About Our Nation by Micheal Medved is available from Crown Forum for $26.95. ISBN-13: 978-0307394064

There's no justice like Angry Mob Justice

Andrew Cunningham was a registered sex offender.

In 2000, he was arrested and jailed for unlawful sex with a 15 year old girl. Following his release, the 52 year old was added to the Sex Offender's Register, which gave his address as the caravan he lived in on a Wandsworth industrial estate. He was taken off the register in March.

On Tuesday night, presumably following information gleaned from the Sex Offender's Register, a 'mob' attacked Cunningham in his caravan, beating and stabbing him in the genitals before killing him and leaving his body in his trashed caravan.

Police are suggesting that he was murdered by a 'vigilante mob' who were attempting to exact justice against pedophiles and sex offenders they saw endangering the community.

Andrew Cunningham's death raises many, many issues.

As a parent, I'm understandably horrified at the thought of sexual predators living in my community. In America, there's even a website you can go to which displays the home and working addresses of those on the sex offender's list. It's alarming to see that three or four live within just a few miles of our home.

The fact that pedophiles and sex offenders live in our community gives all parents something to worry about. In the eyes of the state, these former jailbirds might have been 'rehabilitated,' and pose no danger to the community. However, the case which prompted public access to the Sex Offender's register in the first place - the rape and murder of seven year old Megan Kanka by a former sex offender - proves that just because a sex criminal has 'paid their debt to society,' it doesn't mean they've stopped posing a risk.

But conversely, just because somebody is a registered sex offender, it doesn't mean they do pose a risk to their community. In parts of America, a crime as minor as public urination can get you added to the list (and your address and picture published on a website alongside child rapists.)

Take 17 year old Georgia student Genarlow Wilson. He received oral sex from his 15 year old girlfriend at a student's party and was arrested and sentenced to ten years in prison as a result.

Although a Georgia judge released him after two years, Wilson is still condemned to live as a 'sex offender' for the rest of his life, even though he's guilty of a crime no worse than what thousands of teenagers across the country get up to every weekend.

Just imagine - when Genarlow is a fifty year-old man, the Sex Offender's register will still list him as having 'unlawful sexual relations' with a fifteen year-old. To anybody not bothering to research the facts (that he was the same-age as his teenage 'victim' when they engaged in consensual sex) they might assume that he was a 'dirty old man' abusing a teenage girl.

By publicizing the names and addresses of local sex offenders, are we really protecting the community? Or just empowering people to deliver ill-considered 'justice' against arguably 'dangerous' offenders like Andrew Cunningham?

It's very easy to adopt a 'Daily Mail' attitude that any and all sex offenders deserve whatever they get - even if that's multiple stab-wounds in their genitals, like the late Mr Cunningham. But anybody who's interested in justice might consider the bigger picture.

They might ask themselves whether or not these people deserve to be endangered by having their personal information made public.

I don't have any answers about that. I'm certainly not an advocate for pedophiles and sex offenders. However, I do see issues that need addressing:

America's "Megan's Law," which gives people access to the database of local sex offenders (and it's equivalent abroad) stems from a real case of a registered Sex Offender living in a local community. He was guilty of kidnapping, raping and murdering a little girl. Clearly he was not 'rehabilitated' and posed a very real danger to his community.

That demands we ask:

• Of the serious sex offenders released from prison to cut costs, make space or because of legal issues, how many are actually 'safe?' Wouldn't it be better all around (for both the sex offenders and their local community) if those convicted of serious sex crimes remained in jail? Can they ever be 'rehabilitated?'
• How many people on the sex offender's register aren't really sex offenders? How long before a frat boy convicted of peeing in the streets, or an 17 year-old sentenced after having consensual sex with his 16 year-old girlfriend, gets caught up in misguided 'mob justice'? In the puritanical United States especially (sex toys are still banned in Alabama, for example) how many innocent people are being seared with the same brand as the most disgusting and dangerous of criminals?
• What poses more of a risk to the local community? A solitary sex offender who's name and location is known to the public - or a violent, murderous mob performing the equivalent of an old-fashioned Old West lynching? Is that the sort of 'safe' community anybody wants to live in?

If life has taught me anything, it's that a person can be capable of acts of great goodness or terrible evil. However, 'people', when they're combined into a hysterical, screaming, illogical crowd, are universally just horrible, horrible people.

Should the names of addresses of Sex Offenders really be made public?

Can the public be trusted with that information?

Was society really safe from Andrew Cunningham, and people like him?

Did Andrew Cunningham deserve to be beaten, mutilated and killed for a crime he'd 'served his time' for?

Is the information about convicted sex offenders safer in the hands of police and local law enforcement?

And given that dangerous sex offenders are living amongst us - and some do re offend - can we trust the judgment of law enforcement, which released them, any more than our angry, bloodthirsty mobs?

Or, as Andrew Vacchss wrote in the New York Times, can serious sex offenders ever be trusted to live safely amongst other people?

"The obsession of sexual predators is typified in the case of Donald Chapman, a New Jersey rapist who was released in November after serving 12 years, the maximum for his crime.

He underwent continual therapy in prison, and was utterly unaffected by it. He vows to continue to attack women—a threat that reflects his total absorption with sexual torture. As a result of his threat, he sits in his house in Wyckoff, N.J., surrounded by a 24-hour police guard."

Competition Winner!

Last month, I ran two competitions for a chance to win a signed copy of Adventure Eddy's 'Bootleg Boys.' And we have a winner!

Paisley Penguin got picked from a hat (actually, it was a coffee mug) and will be getting a copy of Bootleg Boys winged over to her as soon as I get her address!

This was fun. Maybe in the new year, I'll have more competitions (and offer prizes that are a little more exciting than a book written by me.)

Well done, Paisley!

And, of course, if you're so inclined, you can get your own copy of Bootleg Boys by following one of the incessant hot links I have littered this post with!

Bootleg Boys

by Roland Hulme

When it comes to doing business with bootleggers, Adventure Eddy soon discovers that breaking deals comes as naturally to them as breaking import regulations.

So when unscrupulous smuggler Joe Jenkins stiffs him as badly as he’s stiffed Customs & Excise, Eddy decides it’s time to take back what he’s owed.

But swindling a swindler isn’t as simple as it sounds – and the local police are getting increasingly suspicious.

Teaming up with a murderous ex-girlfriend, a scheming stripper and an underhanded attorney, Adventure Eddy embarks on his most ambitious exploit to date.

It’ll take daredevil driving, split-second timing and nerves of steel – but at the end of the day, that’s what being one of the Bootleg Boys is all about.

Literature

"I like to devour a good book..."

OM NOM NOM NOM NOM!

The Dark Knight

So I'm not one for hype.

Like everybody else, I was very sad when budding Australian actor Heath Ledger passed away - not least of all because it was impossible to get a cab in downtown Manhattan that day. But reports of him deserving a posthumous Oscar for his final performance in Batman Begins sequel 'The Dark Knight' were, as far as I was concerned, totally outrageous.

Until last night, when I saw it.


Oh. My. God.

The Dark Knight is, quite simply, just the BEST film I have ever seen, ever.

It's just unbelievable. Or, rather, it isn't.


It's a film about the Caped Crusader, Batman, and his villainous enemy The Joker. But unlike those God-awful 90s version, it's also a tense, gritty and - most astonishingly of all - totally believable crime epic.

Heath Ledger's Joker is, quite honestly, the most twisted, terrifying, realistic villain of all time. The plot of the Dark Knight is like a roller coaster, ratcheting you up and up and up until woosh! Down comes the house of cards and into the thick of disaster you get thrown.


The action? Comic-book made credible - it blows Quantum of Solace and other 'real life' big screen baloney out of the water. The acting? Amazing - Heath Ledger just becomes the twisted, faceless Joker - the man Alfred (played by Michael Caine) warns 'just wants to see the world burn.'


It's a film without villains, in which the heroes and the bad-guys are all different facets of the same conundrum. What's right? What's wrong? Where does the law end and justice begin? Do tragic events make us stronger, or destroy us completely? The four man characters, Batman, The Joker, police commissioner Jim Gordon and tragic District Attorney Harvey Dent all face the same choices, but the way they confront their personal challenges is starkly different.

You'll rent it because it's a Batman movie, or because it's Heath Ledger's celluloid curtain-call, or because you want to see the gory birth of 'Two Face,' or because you want to see Maggie Gyllenhaal get blown to smithereens (it's about bloody time.)


But whatever your reason for wanting to see it - you'll love it.